It was time to leave this town.
I was beginning to get the feeling I had been sent to my bird cage and I was not able to get out. My creativity was dwindling fast and I was becoming easily agitated.
I needed to get out and see the world again. I needed a fresh perspective on my life. Each angle was becoming blurry as I continued to try and reposition my view. I needed to be reminded that my life has been bigger than this in the past and Gods promises and my dreams remain just as big. So I did what any soul searcher would do. I went to Palm Springs for a bachlorette party.
Thirty-four hours away from 'the norm' was all I needed to feel alive again. My friend Mac always tells me, “You’re free Coley. His kingdom is so big. Go explore it.” He is right. The wild adventure I have always lived has not ended. God is the same, I am the same, my surroundings are different, but I don’t want to let that make me think I no longer have my wings.
I do have my wings. I am still filled with passion and child like awe. I am still the same girl who left everything time and time again to walk with Jesus to a new place. I still have a desire to see freedom fall on everyone I love. I still can’t wait for us to dance our hearts out together as we live in a world where God’s unexplainable miracles are happening with our hands everyday.
I still have a wild heart that is full of wonder and always searching for the next adventure. I am still His and He is still mine. Our history together cannot be forgotten. It has just as much value and significance as dreaming for the future. If I begin to forget the memories of everywhere He has taken me, I begin to lose faith for where He is taking me next.
The truth is He knows me. He knows what makes me come alive. He knows the crazy way it will all play out. He knows I like crazy. He knows me.
I want to wake up each morning and drink from the goodness of who God has been. To God, the past may very well be as real as the future. This would leave me to believe every bit of my future will be just as real and beautiful as my past. It sounds simple, but sometimes revisiting the radical memories that compose our histories with God can blow wind on our faith in his promises for our future.
Quite a revelation for around 24 hours of bikinis & margaritas. But there you have it.
To creating my own history with God.
-nicole
